Why is it anything? Poop shouldn’t have a face.

That joke started failing to make anyone laugh the first time it was told.

Has there been a real life kissing booth? Always seemed fictional.

This just in: business releases commercial for itself. More at 11.

Long live the devs. Fuck publishers.

So if you are in Ohio, you can marry kids but not lock them in a room. It’s an oddly placed line, but it’s at least a line.

Kame-homo-haaaaaaaaaa!

The cotton candy machine operator might be about to lose his job, but we’re having a great time.

Palm oil isn’t the drug we’re all addicted to.

You’re still doing jars? Why not order from the manufacturer and get an IBC for over your bed?

I’ve always enjoyed it on honeyed brown rice cakes. There’s something to be said for the textural contrast of crispy vs unctuous.

Shareholder profits cannot be allowed to fall. The price will increase, first as a way to make the same profits from a shrinking market, then as a disciplinary measure to teach those poors what happens when you let your friends stop buying product.

This is 2026. Poe’s Law has never been more relevant.

Going to guess their theory is that dealers of legalized drugs want people to do their legal drugs so anything that makes illegal/untaxed drugs more difficult to acquire than their legal drugs benefits their business. For the DEA, there are plenty of scarier drugs than marijuana for which to imprison people. They won’t be out of a job any time soon. And they can even team up with the IRS to hunt down people selling untaxed marijuana like the ATF does with moonshiners.

Referred to as a thorn.

It’s absolutely for your benefit! Oh, wait, did you say user? I thought shareholder. No, you can get in line for the rectal probing with everyone else.

I particularly enjoy the fourth from the top.

It’s already captioned though.

Here comes heat wave Aaauughh.

If this is the simulation the entity that is running it is ineffably more complicated than you can possibly imagine with your tiny simulation of a brain.